This route is the evil twin of the Flatirons classic,

Death And Transfiguration

. The route is similarly long, steep and wild. Were it on better rock the route would be a classic, but it isn't. 3-star moves and position around some poor quality rock in several places.

This climb starts as for "Quiche On A Leash" on the shady N. face of the Maiden. Reach the N. Face via a trail below (to the east) of the rock and head uphill on the North side until a massive, left-leaning, overhanging, broken dihedral is seen. Perhaps 20' up the route there is a ledge to the left and a 10' length of purple webbing hanging down from a fixed pin, as if it were an extended draw to clip; its quality is very, very dubious. (it was already very dubious in 2003) The corner ascends to a needle's eye near the top of the wall, through that and to an anchor/rap station up and left of the top of the route. This is all perhaps 200' from the lowest/East-most edge of the N. Face, or 100' East/below the Standard N. Face route.

Quiche On A Leash goes up the initial dihedral to reach the ledge, passing a 10b layback move with slick feet. From this ledge the ORIGINAL climb (QOAL) walks out left and face climbs back to the dihedral and then up and on, all the way left to the tree below the needle's eye. Refer to Rossiter's Flatirons climbing book.

Rather than do this, place a TCU in a diagonal seam in the left-side wall at waist level (even with the purple webbing's end) and start heading up and right, into the right-most corner, not the left.

Remain there, stemming back and powering up though an initial bulge to reach the right side of the large dihedral. There is a little bad rock in this section, although none of the moves require using it for holds. Continue up to where the pin is anchored and place some good small-med stoppers, then continue up the right most of the twin corners, going through bulge after bulge, trending left with each one as the corner goes that way. There are at least four 5.10 or harder cruxes. Many of the moves were done in a horizontal body position on our ascent. The hardest crux (10d?, tricky & powerful) was protected by the two smallest HB cams I had, a #0 and #00 HB micromate- similar to the smallest 2 Metolius or Alien cams. Later, as teh corners converge you will reach a 1/4"-driven angle and some fixed hardware above that might be the worst I've ever seen, Circa 1950s.  No doubt this was an old aid line, but modern climbing gear can back it up. I presume this to have been the first FREE ascent of the right hand side of the line.

The grade is 'old school' and may not compare to other recently developed routes. Our ascent felt a little harder, but that was likely due to cleaning and testing suspect rock on the lead, even in the middle of the cruxes. The grade is very similar to that of

Death And Transfiguration

.

Real Men Don't Eat Quiche

North Face Right

Warlocks

Direct Start to South Face

Father Knows Best

Quiche on a Leash

South Face

North Crack

North Face

West Face

Sunday Comix

The Human Experiment

East Ridge

Pasta Man

Serpentine Dreams

Climb the left crack in the left-leaning, left-facing dihedral, eventually merging with "

Real Men...

" and tunneling through the needle's eye.

In March 1978, I was at the Matron with Andrew Shepherd and Bob Forbes.  I noticed this line and wanted to try it.  While one belayed, the other took photos with my camera.  I onsighted the route, finding no

in-situ

pins, bolts, or slings on the route, nor at its top.  Neither Andy nor Bob could follow past the first crux.  Some four years later, other climbers claimed the FA and named the route.

During most of my long climbing career, I just went climbing, often leaving no trace, and never bothered to name those experiences or transmit those to guidebook authors.  Until a few years ago, I never bothered to publish climbs I did, even after someone else claimed a FA of the route long after I climbed it.  Now, MP makes posting routes and comments easy.

This is a fairly good route and much more independent that the name might suggest.  This pitch shares nothing but the belay with the standard

North Face

route.

Start in the huge and obvious, left-facing dihedral up and right 15 meters from the

North Face

proper.  Climb the corner past occasional placements, and also use a crack on the left side face.  At a fixed pin, go up and left a move (back it up with gear) onto the left face and then up to a horizontal crack and ledge system even with the tree and anchor at the top of the regular

North Face

P1.

Traversing over, be mindful to protect the second, as a fall for them on a runout would be little different than a lead fall.  This is not a good intro climb for inexperienced followers or leaders.

This is a continuos, steep to slightly overhanging crack system with fist to finger jams and a reachy exit move at the top.  One the best cracks for its grade in the Flatirons.

This route is listed in old and most recent editions of Ament’s

High over Boulder

, Rossiter’s

Flatirons

, and Haas’s Flatirons guidebooks. None of the authors seem to agree on the route description. The ratings go from 5.7 A3 to 5.10 to 10d to 11a, respectively. Not really knowing what to expect, we hoped for sun and a high of 50 degrees in town.

We found the only protectable possibility that seemed to agree with a vague synthesis of the four route descriptions: from a scraggly tree at the base of the wall and directly below the summit, Phil led diagonally left for about 12 feet and then wandered up the flaky face. At around 90 feet, he made a 15-20-foot hand traverse to the right before finishing straight up a short, shallow, left-facing dihedral-ish feature and pulling onto a ledge (crux, 5.9+). This brought us to near the lowest point of the traverse on the old

South Face

route.

This route is so-so. It is an interesting diversion at the Matron but not a destination. There are some really good moves on some pretty poor rock in at least one spot. I scraped off a lot of grit and lichen, and my partner broke off one hand hold. Were the route on better stone, it would be a 2+ star route. As it is, it is a 2- star.

This climb starts on the high end of the North Face, just a short distance East of the West Face and the slab routes there. Soul Survivor boulders up a flake to an initial bolt, goes up and right (reachy) to a big undercling flake, then through the roof left (11b, reachy) or right to underclings and a heel hook (11d, gut-buster). The rock on chalked flake of the right option is crumbly, and grit was falling out of the heel hooks I used. The left way is a "will my foot really stick to that?" move with a hidden jug to match hands on at the lip.

Get to the first bolt (5.9-) to the roof (5.10b) through the roof (11b) and then go up and left to gain a crack which goes up and right (runout of 1-1.5" gear, 5.8) to the 3rd bolt. From the 3rd bolt climb 5.10 and 5.11- moves to the top of the buttress (lichens, crumbing rock in a few places) where you can clip 2 eye-bolts on the top, just at the W. Face intersection. Long slings make a smooth TR possible. If not using slings, save your rope and the bolts, and rap, don't lower off.

This is a bizarre route whose end is about the same elevation as the start!  It is a good winter route as it melts out quickly.  Begin from the highest saddle to the west of the Matron (only about 30' from the base of the West Ridge).  It is easier to reach this saddle from the north, but you can also approach from the south of the Matron (less snow in winter).

Hike down a chute of dirt and pine needles past trees to find a well defined ramp descending out onto the  vertical south face.  Climb down this ramp, which is quite easy, but there are pine needles and loose rock around, and a fall would be fatal, so it is a good idea to be roped up.  This is the most unpleasant pitch of the route.  It is also possible to begin right from the base of the west face, but this is more difficult and involves more loose and crumbly rock.

From here the route is obvious, you simply follow this ramp east as it goes down and then back up.  There are several nice belays along the middle of this ledge, where it is 6' wide.

Eventually, as the ramp heads up, it shrinks down and steepens.  Here you will find several fixed pins.  Finally, the ledge runs out together, and the crux of the route is the remaining 10 feet or so to the East Ridge.  There is an old bolt here to clip before the crux (traverse right from the bolt if you want to make it 5.6, straight up is harder).

Once you reach the east ridge, you will probably be experiencing major rope drag.  The easiest option is to continue traversing until you reach a belay stance.  You can also immediately head up the east ridge, in which case you will discover a foot wide chimney separates you from the rest of the east face.  Continue up the face left of this chimney, and belay near its top.  In either case, continue easily via the top pitch of the East Ridge.

This is the obvious wide crack on the descent from the top of the Matron, north side of the formation.

It is overhanging and wide, you can get 4 to 5s behind the flake.  It probably could be liebacked with hard to place pro.

** I don't know actual route name.

The anchor up top looks scary.

This route is listed in Gerry Roach's book as one of the top ten routes in the Flatirons. It has been a popular route for a long time and is quite historic. To reach the bottom of the climb, hike around to the North side of the Matron and follow a climber's trail up until you reach a large block. Chimney up between this block and the Matron and start on the bench immediately afterwards. The climb is roughly four pitches long - about 1.5 pitches of steep 5.6 on the North Face, and then easy scrambling to the summit on the East Ridge.

P1: follow a left-leaning crack on the face past a few old rusty pins to a ledge with a small tree (5.6).

P2: climb the short crack out onto the East Face, and belay on a ledge wherever convenient (5.6).

From here, the climb is much like scrambling on the East Faces of any Flatiron and is easy, well-featured, and offers little pro. Scramble for a couple hundred feet of 5.2-5.4 to the summit.

This is an excellent route but unfortunately bears the scars of one of Boulder's first bolt wars.  It is also closed from Feb 1 to July 31 due to raptor nesting.  The protection on the first pitch consists of three bolts with nuts only (no hangars) and a few stopper, RP, or tiny cam placements on the upper half of the pitch.  I am not sure if the nuts on these bolts can be unscrewed, but if so, it would be great to put hangars on these bolts (or much better, replace them entirely).  [Replaced in 2014 - see comments.]

The route begins at the highest saddle west of the Matron, and follows the arete between the North face and SW Faces, except for deviating onto the SW face around an overhang at the crux.  It is better to approach via the North side of the Matron.

Climb up the arete to the overhang, and clip the first bolt.  This area is a shameful "bolt graveyard", containing six(!) other bolts that have all been chopped.  Climb up the SW Face, traversing left to clip a second bolt.  Now move up and left back to the arete (also 5.8).

The rest of the first pitch is now much easier and follows the spectacular arete to the rappel anchor at 80'.  There is one more hangarless bolt in this section, as well as a few places for stoppers or small cams.  This first pitch is easily toproped from this anchor, if you are coming down from climbing another route on the Matron.

The second pitch to the summit is easier (about 5.6) and offers excellent protection through the crux.  Move left and up through a broken area to an eye bolt 130' off the ground, then move up and left and skirt the summit overhang to the right.  This area can also be reached by stepping right off the belay and heading straight up some easy cracks.  Clip 4 ancient pins as you skirt the overhang (crux).  This section appears harder than 5.6, but features always appear to make it easier.

Find and do the West Face route on the Matron and note the face just to it's right, going more or less up the center of the West Face (which actually faces SW and gets sun by 10am this time of year). Climb up this to a set of fixed anchors to the left.  One can continue to the summit on West Face.

Rap via a 60m+ line to the West (CAREFUL!) or to the North, where a 60m and probably even a 50M would reach the ground.

The name was inspired by Noam Chomsky, who questions whether the "human experiment" will actually work out on planet Earth, or whether we're all doomed to extinction... time will tell.

Start a few feet right of the very lowest portion of the south face of The Matron, which is on the far east side of the south face, near where the trail pops up to the formation. Climb interesting, alligator-skin flakes (easy 5.8) for 30 feet to a big ledge and the first bolt. Make a 5.10 move or two to a stance, clip the second bolt, and fire up cruxy moves (11c) to the 3rd bolt. Climb through another 5.11 section to a good stance, and place a bomber medium nut (about 1/2-inch) before arriving at the 4th bolt a few feet higher. Make awkward 5.11- moves past the 4th bolt, place an optional #0.75 Camalot, then go out the right side of the large flake, placing a final green Alien or similar (if needed) past 5.8 moves to the anchor and a decent belay ledge.

Pitch 2 is the business and is one of the most unusual pitches I’ve seen in the Flatirons. Use a small nut or purple (smallest) Alien if desired to protect some 5.9/10 moves up to the first bolt above the pitch 1 belay. Clip that bolt, and bust out 12- moves to the next bolt. Continue up to a notable, sloping ramp/feature we call “the Chocolate Sidewalk”. Clip bolt #4 with a long draw or sling, and start “walking” along the Sidewalk, heading up and left for about 60 feet to bolt #11. One might also feel like they are "surfing" the SIdewalk as the entire feature is shaped like the face of a breaking wave. This Sidewalk section has many 5.12 bits with a few rests and lots of the moves are somewhat cryptic and devious. It’s mostly vertical (or lower angle) climbing on decent crimps and small footholds… bring your best face-climbing shoes for this one. Use of longer draws or slings on bolts #8 and #9 will help with rope drag, and also use a longish draw or sling on #11 as the line busts straight up from there. Climb up a steep section past the last 3 bolts, over a thuggish roof feature to a good stance and 2-bolt belay anchor. While no move seems harder than 12+, this pitch probably warrants a 13- rating for the sustained, intricate, and technical climbing involved. Kinda bizarre and hard to rate, so really interested to see what others think there.

The third pitch follows a clean slab (“the Red Ramp”) for 3 bolts on 5.10+ or 11- crimps and thin feet. From there, the line gets steeper and busts through a roof feature, 11+. Clip one final bolt and head to the rap anchor. Take a short rap (50 or 60 feet) down to anchor #2, then a 70-meter rope will get you down to the ledge at the base of Warlocks, where you can scramble west to the ground from there. Note that a 70-meter rope BARELY reaches this ledge, and definitely doesn’t reach the ground, so be careful.

I was tempted to give this a 4-star quality rating but realize that it's old-school-type climbing with some really weird movement... some people used to overhanging thug-fests may not appreciate this rig. Curious to see what folks think about this one?

P.S. note that this formation closes February 1 to August 1 for falcons, so the prime access period is roughly late-September (warmish) through the end of January (often perfect)....

This is another historic and very old route on the Matron, but is not quite as good as the North Face route. Approach the Matron and walk to the very most Easterly of the base. From here, climb one pitch of 5.5 up a ramp that angles from right to left. The pitch is the only semi-difficult one on the route and is very short, about 30 feet. From here, scramble up easy, fun slabs for about 350 feet to the summit.

To descend, rap off double bolt anchors over the back side.

Per

Kevin X

: once you're off the summit, there are two sets of anchors - one to the west (your left while rapping), one to the east, (your right while rapping). With a 60m, go to the anchor to the west, and rap down the slab to the ground. The eastern anchor will not allow you to reach the ground. I am unsure if a 70m would reach the ground from the eastern set.

This is a good but overlooked route.  My partner and I agreed that the climbing was better than the 1-star the Haas book suggests, but a lack of traffic meant some lichen (no loose rock though) which might detract from the rated quality.  This, however, is not a problem for an experienced leader, and I give the route 2* overall on this site, or maybe 3 if it cleans up and aesthetics improve.

Climb the parallel finger cracks low to get onto the wall (small cam protection) and then up to a good stance below the bulge/roof.  Place a good small cam (very small) or 2 under the roof and do some interesting moves to lean into the sidepulls at the roof and cross through it.  The Beta is height-dependent.  This is the crux of the climb physically.  Climb mellow territory passing a small tree on its right side (a medium stopper to the right will keep the rope off of the tree), and then trend left to good holds up on the left side of the blunt arete above, staying left of it and of the

North Face

route.

Once you pass the small tree, the next 50' are the mental crux and is a little adventurous.  Protection is adequate but not always near nor easy to place, so a little wandering and a solid head are necessary.  After 50' of this, you reach a low angle section above the tree, and head up and right on that to a cusp of rock on the east ridge.  Set a belay there.

From this position, it is about 70m up the mellow East Face (5.5?) to the summit and 15m more to the anchors, all with uncharacteristically good protection for a Flatiron.

The route name was inspired by the rattlesnake we almost stepped on while approaching the climb, as well as the sinuous nature of the line.

This climb goes up the steep and blank-looking panel of rock on the north face of the Matron.  This part of the Matron reminds me of the

Roof Routes in Eldorado

. Climb up the chimney formed by the massive flake perched near the base, and stem across the gap to clip the first bolt.  A nearby horn can be slung if the exposure feels too spooky.

From the first bolt, pull onto a wild band of conglomerate knobs, and follow the rising, knobby traverse up and right past the first 4 bolts.  This traverse is 5.11-ish and reminiscent of

Velvet Elvis

.  A crack appears suddenly above the 4th bolt, and a piece of pro here will be helpful to better protect a tricky sequence working up to the 5th bolt.

Crank up past the 6th bolt to the 7th, and arrive at a suddenly blank sheet of rock with few but mostly crisp and clean holds.  The business of this pitch is climbing through the next 20 feet of thin climbing past 3 more bolts. There are lots of devious sequences, high steps, and interesting movement through there. Once through this section, larger holds allow easier 5.10 and 11- climbing to the arete (where it merges with the top of the

West Face's

1st pitch) and then to the anchor.

Description

Protection

Routes in The Matron